Love...

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won!

Thats from James Blunts song "Goodbye my lover".

How much shit do u take? Nothing i´d say. i´ll give it right back to you.
But how much do u take from a person u deeply love?

Too much! Sad to say but it´s true. How many women believe their guys when they swear to god once again they´ll never lay a hand on them again.

I had a friend, i´ve lost contact with her, who got beaten and verbally abused by her hubby.
I never understood it. For example, the three of us were in a car going down the highway and they would start fighting. Me in the back and they would go at it, really bad.
He´d yell: I´m gonna crash and kill us all!! And i´ll be like, EXCUSE ME!!! I am here too and i don´t wanna die cause of u idiot.
So many incidents and i was right in the middle of it.
Strangely i just had to say his name a few times and he would stop. He had this strange respect for me. I never understood why.
Many years i tried to talk her into leaving him. She never would, i never understood her. But in the end i know she had to make the decision herself, see that it has to stop.

She once told me, I rather have him hit me than abuse me verbally. Bruises go away but the words stay in my head. I was stunned. She was a very pretty girl with bad childhood. Men just always abused her. I always told myself i would never let anyone do this to me.

15 years later i still see it that way. A lot of things happend to me but i always walked away from whole. I never took any shit. And gladly i never had to.

For all those who are guessing now that i write this cause of Scott. U are wrong. He has done nothing like this, and he never will.
We have a hard time being apart. And he has hurt me with his behaviour. But he loves me deeply and it´s something i can live with. He didn´t do anything badly. No worries. If i can live with it you all can too!!

It´s the time issue. How much time are u willing to give? do u break a promise u made?
Let your girl wait and forget about her while u are gettin wasted with your mates. Giving your girl the cold shoulder. I gotta go.

Everything will be fine

Angie