Happy new year !!!

I wish all my faithful readers a wonderful and blessed 2008 !
May it be a good one for you!
Sending out all my love to you!

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i admit it....

ok ok... i admit it....
i am playing with julias nintendo ds lite... and i love it....
I admit i fight her for it... yeah ... am i a bad mom cause of that ? lol
I admit i sent her to bed early a few times cause i wanted to play lol
Now stop yelling or is that a laugh???
i admit i created my own dog in the nintendogs game... yeah i have !!!
Yeah i feed the dogs when julia lost interests! i bath them and go for walks!
Yeah YEAH yeah ... u can stop laughing now... dont want them to die dont we???
Hey, but julias friends think she has a cool mom and their mommies dont feed the dogs and help lol... see ????

So... gotta go now cause some of our animals need to be walked ! lol

Everything will be fine


For Amy....

This one goes out to Amy... i love u just the way u are ! By your side all the way ! Hugs

Star... by Reamon

i heard them live! so wonderful... just love their songs!

How many times... how many lies !

I came across this song on the net when i was searching for something else... and i am hooked onto it now... been listening to it cause it feels like she is talking about how i feel sometimes ...when i am confused about how to deal with feelings for a certain somebody... no no... i am not sad... listen to it!

They would try to tell me something
Oh, but I was hearing nothing
When they said you were just playing me
I didn't listenI didn't want to
You couldn't find a blinder fool

I'm here Searching through the wreckage
Wondering why the message never got through
And I found I i misplaced all of my faith
How could I put my faith in you?

How many times?
How many lies?
How long you been sneaking?
How long you been creeping around?
How many lies?
How many times?
Were you here deceiving
When I was here believing in you.

I got to put the blame on myself
Should've known with everyone else.
Just knowing they knew you was just bad news
I should've walked out (I should've walked out)
I should've stayed clear (I should've stayed clear)
I'm glad your sad ass is out of here !

I've gone and thrown out all the records
All the ones that ever reminded me of you.
I've gone and tore up all the pictures
'Cause there was not one shred of truth.

There were so many times
There were so many lies
I don't know why I stayed on you
There were so many days
There were so many games
I should've thrown your sad ass out.

But now the game is through
I'll never trust in you
I've finally got wise
I opened up my eyes
Your game is over!

How many times?
How many lies?
How long you been sneaking?
How long you been creeping around?
How many lies?
How many times?
Were you here deceiving
When I was here believing in you
I opened up my eyes!

How many times... how many lies ?

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My day....Part 1

6 am...gosh i need to go the bathroom but i am too lazy
6:02 am... turning around... is that a hand?
6:03 am... trying to remember with whom i went to sleep last night
6:03:15sec...phew... that is my ex hubby... NO NO NO.. now dont have any naughty thoughts people... too many people stayed at my place so there was just one place left... beside me lol... nah i have been good...on the other hand
6:05 am ... turning towards him... oh... the snoring...i forgot... one thing i didn´t miss... hmmm
6:07 am... still thinking what to do...placing an arm on his chest... is he waking up? still snoring... moving around a bit...still snoring... new plan... ha ha... putting a leg over his... that will work... ya ya i got a response... he turns around... he looks at me... he smiles and... goes back to sleep... so much for my sex appeal early in the morning... i gotta go to the bathroom anyways so...
6:10 am... trying to find my way out of a dark room... wait .. hey... why?
6:10:26 sec... turning the light on!!!!!!!!!!
6:11 am... finally in the bathroom and... aaahhhhhh
6:12 am... looking in the mirror... oh man.. who is that? better get out lol
6:15 am ... coffee machine on... refilling water...
6:16 am ... walking to the window... beautiful... all white.. and hey its not snow... ice
6:20 am... coffee... nice... hot... damn forgot milk and i am on the sofa.. to lazy... drink black? grrrr... ok
6:55 am ... still on the sofa listening to music... can´t fall asleep anymore
7:14 am... washing face and teeth... yeah i am motivated!!!!
7:22 am ...damn i turned the tv on ! damn damn damn... why? there is a SISSY movie...awww why now??? i love those movies grrrr.. only just a bit....
8:40 am.... ok ok... i know... but i love those movies SORRY!!!
8:45 am ... going online for a bit... just to check mails
9:35 am ... i was just checking mails... i swear lol
9:55 am ... got lots of emails... don´t u laugh!... ok ok... i blogged too sigh
10:05 am ... sabine called me down to eat brekkie with her... hey good idea
10:47 am ... ended up singing karaoke in sabines living room! "it´s raining men!"
11:25 am... gosh i need to do so many things .. bake cookies... bake a cake? shower... hang clothes... make lunch... vacuum the floors... dish wash...make the tuna dip... prepare the table...
11:26 am...phone is peeping.. a sms.. hmmm... don´t know that number... it´s jaiveer... wow... never thought i would hear from him... an estonian number... hmmm not replying for now... gotta think about it
Call Me When You're Sober
Dont cry to me
If you loved me
You would be here with me
You want me, come find me
Make up your mind

Should´ve let you fall
And lose it all
So maybe you can remember yourself
Cant keep believing
Were only deceiving ourselves
And Im sick of the lies
And youre too late

Dont cry to me
If you loved me
You would be here with me
You want me, come find me
Make up your mind

Couldnt take the blame
Sick with shame
Must be exhausting to lose your own game
Selfishly hated
No wonder youre jaded
You cant play the victim this time
And youre too late

So dont cry to me
If you loved me
You would be here with me
You want me, come find me
Make up your mind

You never call me when youre sober
You only want it cause its over
Its over

How could I burn paradise
How could I
You were never mine

So dont cry to me
If you love me
You would be here with me
Dont love me
Just get your things
Ive made up your mind

Happy holidays!

Happy holidays my faithful readers! i will try to come during the next days and tell u what Santa brought me! It´s very cold here... no snow but -6.... brrrrr.... Julia slept at a friends house and i should do so many other things than sit here... sigh...

tonight i will attend a friends bday party... She will be 50! Happy bday Renate!!!

right now i don´t feel like going!

Had a short conversation with scott and he told me he lost his phone with all the numbers and to tell teena and phil! Alright... i did so today... i do have to say i feel i am being played... both parties told me they wont talk to each other anymore... but who to believe... who can i trust?

i do know for sure now that a big part of my feelings for scott have died... he did a good job... i don´t feel love anymore as i used to... it hurts to think about the time... but i have moved on... i wished he could see a friend in me as i see in him... but men are different i guess...

i had a strange dream the other night... that scott got married and he invited me... i went with B and in church scott turned around .... told me that he can´t say yes with me being there ... he asked me to wait outside... strange huh...

he disappointed me so much... for the second time... but i have learned from it... am letting go...

i am very sad when i read in Aims site today... what is this hating all about?... she is such a beautiful person... i am with her all the way... i wish people would just back off and leave her alone!

To all of you.... HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!

everything will be fine


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For B... What u don´t know :(

This goes out to B... i am so sorry that u feel that i hurt u so... it was not my intention... my feelings for u are strong but i am afraid i guess... i know u said i should let u love me... but the fear of getting hurt again is so big... will u have patience and wait for me?... i wanna tell u so many things... i know u wait for my call... i know u wait for me to show up at your door... i know... i feel so much for you...


What you don´t know Is that your scars are beautiful. What you don´t know It´s your imperfections always makes me home.What you don´t know Is how we spare our time Cause I can´t speak whenever you´re around...
And it´s not like me to hide behind a wall.And it´s not like me to fear before.
What you don´t know Is that I lay awake...Wishing you were here tonight!What you don´t know That I loved you long before we were alive.Cause how would you know, how could you know.So now I´m gonna tell you everything...
What you don´t know I have studied the way you walk.What you don´t know Is I´ve already kissed you in the shadows of my heart.What you don´t know Is that you´re poetry. If you turn around there´s someone you won´t see!
What you don´t know Is when in the morning the sun light comes .The morning comes there´s time I won´t be afraid to try...

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Merry xmas!

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Hey everybody! are u having a good time?
We are still waiting for snow but its already cold!
Christmas is coming up so fast now and i am way behind everything!
Haven´t baked cookies. Haven´t bought all the presents!
i started knitting socks for julia with her name on it!
yup.. thats keeping me busy! I haven´t knitted socks in ages and this will be my last one too for a long time.Gosh me and my ideas!
Or should i say.. thank you Sabine!!! lol
I won´t be on the next days so i wish u all happy holidays now.
Julia and me are doing fine and we are looking forward to all the xmas festivities with our friends.

Singing xmas songs and julia playing the flute. Did u all know that "silent night" is from Austria? created in a cold night in the year 1818 ( i think i remember that right) from 2 guys here in austria. the song travelled all around the world. isn´t that amazing?

I hope u all will have a wonderful xmas time with your families! Enjoy your holidays!
Hope u all get a present ! ( Depends if u were good during the last year?)

see u all soon!

Everything will be fine!

p.s: Aims i got your messages but u obviously don´t get my replies :( miss u too! hugs!
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Long Distance? - NO !!

Hey hey hey... am single ... once again... i refused to be in just another long distance relationship...i tried it once with scott and i learned from it... I know B´s opinion to it... he is just 2 hours away and here a lot... but i am not doing it again... he says i broke his heart... gosh... yeah i do feel guilty... but it´s not what i want... i do hope he will understand... he is having a hard time... he thinks i broke up with him cause of scott... how wrong can he be!

I support him all the way... he loves playing soccer and he should do whats right for him... playing for a league club in another country is another important step in his career... i just don´t see myself being a players wife... he sees things in me i don´t... so we are in a difficult situation... the time we have been together he proved that he is a real man... he stood by me... he was there for me... show me a guy who is still there while the woman he loves still battles with feelings for his ex?... so am i being unfair to him?

I have times when i feel i did the right thing ... and there are times when i am so confused... he says he needs me now... sigh... i am doing the best i can... i am sorry B... so sorry....

In gods hands

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In gods hands....

I am sick of answering questions about Scott...from now on song lyrics will do that for me...it was a thing scott and me did... sending the other one a line out of a song and the other knew instantly what it was all about... looks like u won´t let him step out of my life... i am starting to accept that your interest is still so huge when it comes to this topic ... i know that it was like a soap opera here at times on my blog... sigh... but it will be played in a different way now... my way... so the first song that comes to my mind thinking about him now is...

Nelly Furtado * In gods hands*

I looked at your face
I saw that all the love had died
I saw that we had forgotten to take the timeI,
I saw that you couldn't care less about what you do
Couldn't care less about the lies
You couldn't find the time to cry

We forgot about love
We forgot about faith
We forgot about trust
We forgot about us
Now our love's floating out the window
Our love's floating out the back door
Our love's floating up in the sky in heaven
Where it began
back in God's hands

You said that you had said all that you had to say
You said baby it's the end of the day
And we gave a lot but it wasn't enough
We got so tired that we just gave up
We didn't respect it
We went and neglected it
We didn't deserve it
But I never expected this

Our love floated out the window
Our love floated out the back door
Our love floated up in the sky to heaven
It's part of a plan
It's back in God's hands
Back in God's hands
It didn't last
It's a thing of the past

Oh we didn't understand
Just what we had.... our love is back in gods hands!

Hey ya all!

Sorry i have been neglecting you... but there was so much going on and i couldn´t be bothered writing about it all... i know i know i didn´t even blog about vienna... I AM SORRY !!!

i am doing my best to come here more often... time goes so fast...but i am reading your emails and answering them!

well where should i start... hmmm.... xmas is coming up and i don´t have any presents yet... didn´t even think about my xmas cards cover this year... should i dare and buy some at a store? ... i know many would be dissapointed to not get a self made this year... sigh... i will try... I WILL TRY!!!

Julia was looking for a english speaking penpal and asked if i could ask scott... she thought maybe his daughter Olivia would be interested... i told her i don´t wanna message him but she can... and she sent him a sms.... he still didn´t reply to this day... she was very sad and i said i would call him to see if he was maybe out of credit .... only to hear that his phone was off... i haven´t tried since... now i am dissapointed too that he didn´t even answer... but i think he has a good excuse.... hope everything is ok with him!

Things are moving fast for sabine now... she maybe a divorced woman in a few weeks... yay!!! i don´t wanna say more about this case now... but we are keeping her on the right track and i think she is doing ok... i am trying my best.

I am still thinking what to get julia for xmas... i am SO NOT in a shopping mood! yeah yeah u heard right! ANGE ISN´T IN A MOOD TO SHOP! now don´t start to cry or freak out... i will be ok... lol

this year i am looking forward to xmas... we will make a family xmas... that what xmas is for me... a family event and not a religious holiday...Andi was calling me asking if we would have to buy presents for each other... we started that a few years ago... buy each other a present ...he was in a bad mood and i was then too... if u don´t want then not!!! WHATEVER!!!

yeah i admit i like to get presents too... I LIKE TO OPEN AT LEAST ONE PRESENT AT XMAS!!!!
Somebody? anybody?????? just one????sigh... am in a strange mood today... spent all morning sitting opposite a guy who smoked pipe and i have a headache now! i stink like pipesmoke and i hate that... grrrrrr
my hair... my clothes... i hate that...

A big hug to my girl Aims! MISSING U TOO! AND I WANT A PASSWORD! LOL

everything will be fine

Anyone who can touch you
Can hurt you
or heal you
Anyone who can reach you
Can love you
or leave you.....

Once again... Scott....

i know u have been mailing me again with questions to Scott... i haven´t been answering cause i wasn´t here and a big part was that i didn´t want to... U gotta understand i am trying to move on... my time with him was wonderful... i don´t regret our time together... but it is over!

i do have to admit that i cried on the way to vienna ... we were sleeping and i was laying there... looking out seeing all the stars and i listened to love songs... and yes i had to think about him... i did miss him... he always knew when i was in a train... wanting to drive it... old memories... it was a full moon... i was emotional... sorry... i don´t regret my tears... it hurts...

And i am not upset at him thinking he cheated on me... NO! i know he didn´t cheat on me while we were together... it was that he couldn´t stand up for me... old topic that i don´t want to warm up again... i will gladly answer all your questions but i think when u followed the story reading my blog u will know what is going on...

I wish him all the best... he is in a new relationship and i am too...and yes i still have feelings for him... i can´t deny that... but i am doing just fine...i am just so tired talking about him! i am sorry!

Snow !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snooooowwww!!!!! Ya ya ya... sorry Sabine! It has been snowing and i love it! Early snow! Even more up in the mountains. So ski season will start soon i guess, as early as this upcoming weekend. i love snow. It´s a heavy snow though, very wet. Would prefer some dry snow but hey i am not complaining... its´snow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Julias bday was good. Lots of people. Her party will be this weekend though.Because of the snow! So we will spend this saturday in an inside pool. yay! gotta find my bathing suit somewhere in my closet.

My girl is 12 now!!! wow... sheezeee.... she says THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU WHO SENT HER BIRTHDAY WISHES!

Happy birthday !!!!!

Hey ya all! Sorry i haven´t been blogging but life is keeping me busy! Hope all of u are doing ok!
I promise to update u on our vienna trip! I will, i promise!

Tomorrow is my girls birthday!!! YAYYYY!!! she will be 12... damn, time goes so fast! I am the mum of a 12 year old! Cool!

I love her so much! And i am proud of her! she is growing up to be a wonderful young lady!
Have heaps of things to do! Cakes to bake and Bday parties arrangements.

We will celebrate with friends and family tomorrow and on saturday she will have her party with her friends !

Happy Birthday Julia !!!!
I love you!


Honey is back!!!

Hey ya all! I am back and i see i have been missed! i missed u too! i won´t be able to blog long now but i will update u on my trip and also add some pics!
am so tired and have to wash loads of dirty clothes lol!

everything is so fine!


2:0 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

we went to see our boys play and it was darn cold...
so we sat there...
winter jacket...
gloves and scarf and a cup of tea in our hands...
and they won for us!!! yeah!!!
and ma babe shot both goals... even a bigger YAYYY!
we made some pics ... will publish em later!
now i am off cause someone has been good and gets a reward! wink wink ;-)

everything will be good!

you are no loss...

You stalked all those years waiting to pounce
like mary, you'd comfort then judas, renounce
seeking some light of guidance
i saw your dagger glint
and boy did you kick
when i hit the floor
your fake sympathy
kicked my ears even more
growing rich from my toil
like i worked in your shop
the good old days
you used to bind me like rope
dragged me through traitor's gate
talking of hope
my cards you revealed
when i was winning the game
you shot me with arrows
from nostalgias bow
the rules to this sick game
only you seemed to know
from 'high' all the time
then to stooping this low
you played at being my friend
now confess how you gagged
with envy, swallowing my success
you laughed loud, i was finished
when i laid down to rest
my weakness, your banquet
how your table's been blessed
i need all your hurt
like a hole in my head
i gave you one thousand percent
of my trust and my most private feelings for you,
i would defrost
i crowned you with light
maybe too hastily
there was never a problem
who took and who gave
but you killed off our friendship
so let it rot in its grave
the bed is so stoney
when innocence dies
you held your nose and through ambition
you'd wade how can you dig for gold
when your spade's not a spade?
you suffered in silence
in full combat stance 'et tu brute'
you stabbed me when you saw your chance
i need all of your hurt
like a hole in my head !

Non excisting....

just as i wrote something nice about the end he turned around and put a knife in my back...

well if i am honest i should have known... no i didn´t know he would throw me out there so he can look good or not have to argue with anyone... i know he never had a problem with hurting my feelings... yeah i am not there and couldn´t bother him... he doesn´t like to fight with people and does everything to avoid it... but to put a knife in my back and throw me out there?

back then he said i was stalking him to not get into an arguement with karen... afterward to me he said he was trying to protect me... how?
he made a promise and broke it knowing i would forgive him anyways...
is it my fault?
i put myself out there... i had no problem standing up for him... he never did...
a weak person... well its the end for me...

he overdid himself! so low! wow!
i don´t care about what he did or didn´t do... cheated on me or not... that doesn´t matter to me... but what he did on saturday was worse ...

he killed us! he does not excist for me anymore! so this is the end!he is no loss!
i wish him good luck with his new girl...

I hope the ring you gave to her Turns her finger green!
I hope when you're in bed with her you think of me!
Does it hurt To know I'll never be there?
bet it sucks to see my face everywhere!
It was you Who chose to end it like you did !

Never again will I hear you!
Never again will I miss you!
Never again will I fall to you !
Never !!!!
Never again will I kiss you!
Never again will I want to!
Never again will I love you!
Never! !!!

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Taking a break...

hey my faithful readers,

as u could read in my last blog entries that there is some drama heading my way and already partly hit me. So i decided to take a break for a while. I don´t want and need all this in my life.

Scott and me talked quite a bit lately and we are ok with the choices we made. He couldn´t hold on any longer since he needed me so much right there with him and let go. I understand his reasons... now i do. He needed somebody there and kinda replaced me with an australian girl. Sounds cruel huh but thats the way it is. I am not mad at him. I know what he felt. I felt the same way. Knowing there is somebody u love so much and not being able to hold and feel that person. It was hard. We did it for a long time and then it was too much.

He has now a girl in his life who i hope makes him very happy. I do know Scotts faults and i hope he won´t repeat them. I´ll try to tell him what not to do but well... he is a man after all. And a stuborn and proud one too.

I too have a man in my life who makes me smile. Who is fun to be around. Who treats me like his Queen. It would be unfair to him too letting this drama hit me. He has been patient already and i thank him for that.

so let Scott and me live our lives. We tried and we couldn´t make it. We did the best and loved each other with all our heart. What´s going on and has been going on between scott and me, stays between scott and me and i hope u all understand that.

i love u all dearly and i am not mad at anyone. I need my time away and will be back when i am ready. I will try to hop in and blog once in a while.

Everything will be fine!


So called friends....

gosh what a day... last days... so much information coming my way... but the most about a particular person... a so called friend... i always tried to be nice to the person... i had nothing against her.... that person never did anything wrong... i thought... scott always told me to be careful... i told him i have no problem with that person... but now i found out that person has been decieving and playing with peoples feelings...

gosh i am so angry right now... so upset... that person tried to hook scott up with somebody else while we were together? i thought i fall off the chair when i heard it... hey the good thing is that i know now that he was always faithful... he didnt even know it was a set up... i do believe him... that person even told him i was not good for him... yup u heard right....

now u know how upset i am... that person told me that scott is no good for me... so i ask myself what intention this person had... whatever have i done to be played like this?... have i been rude to that person?.... ignored that person?... i know i was always nice... trusted that person... and it hurts now to find out how i got betrayed...

gosh i need to get some air... i´ll blog more when i calmed down

in all this i found a new friend and thank u for being there for me! listening to my shit! and i am not mad at you! not at all!

i gotta go... hit a pillow ... throw some things...

but i promise you...

Everything will be fine ( hell yeah)


you are in love ?

Now after Scott and me talked yesterday night B took me in his arms and told me everything will be alright... and i believed him... we smiled at each other and i could see the love in his eyes... and i felt butterflies in my tummy... i am falling in love with this man.... so as we were laying there watching tv together i heard a song in this movie i know from years back... Wilson phillips / you´re in love....wow... how strange to hear that... but it fits...

to scott....

Open the door and come in
I'm so glad to see you my friend
Don't know how long it has been
Having those feelings again.

And now I see that you're so happy
And , it just sets me free
And I'd like to see
Us as good of friends
As we used to be

my love, You're in love
That's the way It should be
'Cause I want you to be happy

You're in love
And I know
That you're not in love with me
it's enough For me to know
That you're in love
Now I'll let you go
'Cause I knowThat you're in love

Sometimes it's hard to believe
That you're never coming back to me
I've had this dream that you'd always be by my side
Oh I could have died.

But now I see that you're so happy
And , it just sets me free.
And I'd like to see Us as good of friends
As we used to be

I tried to find you but you were so far away
I was praying that fate would bring you back to me
Someday, someday, someday...

you're in love
Ooh it's enough For me to know
That you're in love
Now I'll let you go
'Cause I know
That you're in love!

good luck to you! i´ll always love u and i´ll always be there for you!
Your Angel

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Talking to an ex gf....

scott and me just talked and i found out a new few things... not just nice ones and i wont mention them here cause we found out that a certain somebody has been saying things to keep us apart... i am very dissapointed but i think we should have known....

we are proud of ourselves we held on so long and showed them all... nobody could break us up... they tried... but we stood strong and yeah we are proud of ourselves... and i know i speak in scotts name too ...

he is at his new girls place a lot... they might move in together soon... thats cool... he wants to keep a close friendship with me and will tell her all about me...

now dont get me wrong... i would like to keep a close friendship with him ... but... telling her his ex gf is still in the pic?... i wouldnt like that... i dont want to be a problem in their relationship...
he said he never turned his feelings off for me... now is that good or bad?

i hope this turns out good... he wont get into any troubles with her

its all so confusing... he is doing what he has to do... he doesnt want to be alone and he took the step to be with a girl...

he apologised for not holding on any longer... i understand it... i was in that boat too... we built up something good and i dont regret it...

i am tired... need to sleep... need to organise my thoughts and feelings... but how with that man waiting for me in my bed... am i moving on too fast? i am not scott... am i doing the right thing?

everything will be fine



do u know that feeling when u are really in love with somebody! u can´t imagine life without that other one! the person is always there! Tells u how much he needs u and that u saved him! Makes u feel the most important person in his world! could there ever be a life without that person? Can u imagine? i never could... i felt it

now.... i hear myself say... i am happy u found a girl who makes u happy.... WHAT? did i really say that? impossible a few weeks ago... heartbreak...my soulmate... touching somebody else...saying i love you to another girl... smiling at her...laughing with her... WAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Hell! .... but... there is a life after scott.... and i am living it!
and he is living without me too!

does he feel the same way? i know he did after we broke up. he couldnt stand to know i was with somebody. now he is with somebody else too...he told me he is tempted to say Angel to her but he hasn´t yet and will never, cause that is me... to him that is me... Angel... a tear rolled down... reminded me why i was with him... the caring, loving, funny, charming guy who loves so much to have an own family... we had plans... we had this passion for each other...
i have to say i was jealous... i wanted to be the one...now...

i wake up in the morning beside a man that is not scott... and it feels ok... this man is making me happy and loving me... i hope i can give it back to him

yesterday night we talked about this.... the strangest feeling... i still love him but i can say with all my heart...I HOPE SHE MAKES U HAPPY!!!

everything will be fine


FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
REAL FRIENDS: are the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs
REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM

FAKE FRIENDS: bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
REAL FRIENDS: Would sit next to you sayin "Damn ... we fucked up ... but that shit was fun!"

FAKE FRIENDS: never seen you cry.
REAL FRIENDS: cry with you

FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
REAL FRIENDS: keep your shit so long they forget its yours.

FAKE FRIENDS: know a few things about you
REAL FRIENDS: Could write a book about you with direct quotes from you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME!"

FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile.
REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
REAL FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say "Bitch drink the rest of that you know we don't waste."

FAKE FRIENDS: will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Will knock them the fuck out!!

i saw this and instantly thought about sabine! We already have this! Isn´t it great to know there is somebody who always has your back? LOVE YOU girl!

Everything is so fine


he woke me saturday morning....

so so so....hmmm so so.... how was your weekend my friends?
well i gotta say mine was pretty interesting....

saturday morning, around 8:30am i get woken by a sms....
gosh i hoped it wasn´t sabine wanting to go shopping already lol (ya i know sabine!!!)
so i opend the message and its from .... any guess?.... common try harder.... yeah?
yes... from Scott.... he was already rotten drunk... ok... i knew he was at Oktoberfest with his mates getting drunk but i wasnt counting on him messaging me...

so we talked quite a lot while he was there getting drunk and drunker... i have to say i do worry about him when he gets like this... he knows i am and usually lets me know when he is home safe...

later that saturday i was pretty busy and forgot about it... SORRY!
we went to see our boys play.... they won 1:0 and we are number 4 now !!!!!!!!!!

WE ARE NUMBER 4!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ( well for this week sigh... hope they can stay on that place !)

so they won and my babe was in good mood... we went out at night and had a wonderful time... i spent the night at his place....
and.... after midnight my phone peeps... a message... i thought NO FUCKING WAY.... HOW DOES HE KNOW WHAT I AM DOING AGAIN????.... its always been like this since we broke up... he just always knew when something was happening.... so it would be rude to look at the message while... well u know what... so i forgot about it and checked it when i woke up hearing another peep at 5:30 am....

oh well.... he was sound asleep beside me and so i looked at the message.... with one eye open...
it was from teena.... ended friendship with scott?... what ? who? where?... so i opend my other eye lol... and asked her why.... OH MY! ok ... the girls were out and one sent a pic of her boobs to him as a dare and he got in problems with his girl?... there is a girl?... now that is funny...

so they got into a fight... i messaged scott too but he was still sleeping having a really bad hang over... later on he told me everything was ok... today i asked him and he was being rude to me... oh well...

i know i would be pissed too if i would still be his girlfriend... but since thats not the case i am not mad at the girls... it didnt bother his new girl that he messaged me all evening... hmmmm... strange story....

i know how he gets when he is drunk and i hope he wasnt too rude to teena!

i also got a sad message from Manfred saturday... his grandma died... she was in a coma for 8 years and i think it is better like this... still ... one funeral to go this week... i promised him...

Andy is being a charmer once again... i´ll get ya one day mister!!! i´ll try to be nice in vienna!! lol

and great news............ AL GORE won the peace nobel price !!! way to go!!!!!!!!!!!!!

everything will be fine


Have a great weekend....

i wish u all a great weekend!!! to teena HAPPY BDAY and i hope not too much stress moving !

And remember to kick Scott!!!!!!!!!

Love you all

mwah... and rock to this song... i love it!!!

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Happy b-day Teena....

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Happy birthday to my australian friend Teena ! May all your dreams come true... blessings and love girl....

Breast Cancer....

Yes girls it´s once again time for me to talk to you about breast cancer... it is so important to know about it... do u self examine your breasts every month after your period??? U DON´T?????.... shame on you!! and i really mean it... its easy and fast to do... u need to take care of yourself girls....

did u know ......

RISK FACTORS- No one knows the exact causes of breasts cancer, but research has shown that women with certain risk factors are more likely than others to develope the disease.

they include...

- older age, half of all women diagnosed are over age sixty-five
- early onset of menses or late menopause
- diets high in saturated fat
- older age at birth of first child or never having any given birth
- a personal history of breast cancer or benign breast disease
- a family history, particulary a mother or sister
- Treatment with radiation therapy to the breast/chest
- breast tissue that is dense or mammogram
- taking hormones such as estrogen and progesterone
- obesity
- moderate alcohol intake - more than 2 drinks per day
- gene changes, including BRCA1, BRCA2 and others

Now to the symptoms ladies.... i don´t wanna bore u but this is important stuff for us...u still with me here? i hope so.....

Generally, early breast cancer does not cause pain. Even so, a woman should see her health care provider about breast pain or any symptoms that wont go away.

* a change in how the breast or nipple feels

u may experience nipple tenderness or notice a lump or thickening in or near the breast or in the underarm area!

* a change in how the breast or nipple looks

this could mean a change in size or shape of the breast or nipple that is turned slightly inward.In addition, the skin of the breast, areola or nipple may appear scaly, red or swollen or may have ridges or pitting that resembles the skin of an orange.

* nipple discharge

u dont know how to make a self examination?

do me the favour ! it´s quick and easy !

everything will be fine

Angie ( who did a self examination just this morning !!!)